People often think that big changes are necessary for beginnings to occur, yet I have found after all this time (which really isn't all that much), that it is in the innocuous, and benign where true beginnings happen. I had believed that I would not begin to blog until something momentous had happened. I am scheduled to leave the nest and enter college in the fall. That seems to be a perfect time to begin: new life, new start - new me! My life is still happening however, and I see no reason to put it on hold until late August just because that has been declared a "milestone of my life."
That is a lesson just recently acquired.
I have been counting down the weeks until this chapter ends and another one begins. You've read books like that haven't you? Ones where you count the pages, read it as fast as you can, then, once it's finished, you look back and realize: Wow I missed so much...and now it's over.
That was how the Harry Potter novels seemed to me. I remember that I had looked forward to the sixth one since the day that I had finished the 5th and had after over a year of waiting, completed the book by 5:30 a.m. the morning it was released. While there was a sense of accomplishment (I was the first one done of my friends hands down), it was tainted by a sense of loss...of regret. Thankfully I am able to reread the book, a luxury which doesn't apply to life.
We don't get to skip around to our favorite parts of our story. Heavens, we don't even know exactly how our story will turn out or what even the next sentence will be. So what is there to do but to enjoy the words we do have? There may be a few spelling errors, grammatical mistakes, and parts that we just want to cross out, but they are the parts that make us who we are, and if we don't spend the time focusing on every part of the story we lose the chance of full character and plot development later on.
So lesson learned: While I will continue my countdown, (it's hard to break a habit which has been in place for over a year) it won't be one filled with longing of being in the next place or bitterness at having to finish the chapter. It will merely be a statement. A declaration. One which won't be checked on quite so often.